Friend didn’t even let me explain...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

A close friend of mine recently turned away from me because of a misunderstanding, and no longer communicates with me. There is a lot of hostility on his part, and nothing I say or do has made an impact because there is no word from him at all. We went to school and college together and losing him for something that isn't even true breaks my heart. I don't know if he will change his mind a few years down the line but, even if he does, I will always remember that he chose to end our friendship without giving me a chance to explain myself. Should I even bother trying to bring him back into my life?
Disagreements and misunderstandings are common in any relationship, as is the possibility of being spurned. What matters is whether the two of you believe that the other's presence is important. It sounds as if your friend needs time to work through what he is angry about. Anger can prevent any messages from getting through, so his refusal to communicate isn't exactly surprising. Why not leave him alone for now, give him some space, and hope that he arrives at a place of clarity? In time, when he has weighed the pros and cons of not having you in his life, your situation may change. You can think about whether you want to remember this episode after the two of you have reconciled. To worry about it now doesn't help you in any way.

My boyfriend wouldn't commit to a long-term relationship even though we were together for over three years, so I broke up with him. A year later, he reached out, asking if I would marry him. I don't know what to do. I love him, but I don't know if he is doing this just to win me back.
If he is committing to marriage, and is doing so of his own accord, the only thing you have to consider is whether you still have feelings for him.

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