LGBTQIA+ individuals react to the ongoing marriage equality hearings

Millions of LGBTQIA+ persons across India are experiencing a flurry of emotions as litigators debate identities, and rights in the fight for marriage equality

In a historic fight for marriage equality, millions of queer individuals across the country have been glued to their screens as final arguments take place in the Supreme Court of India. The live streaming of court proceedings has enabled people to be present in the landmark hearing, which will decide whether the law will permit LGBTQIA+ persons a life of dignity. To refer to these as high stakes would be an understatement.

As litigators bring identities and rights to question in the apex court, the deliberations have triggered a wide range of emotions in several LGBTQIA+ individuals, including anger and feelings of hopelessness at the lack of sensitivity. To deepen our understanding of the proceedings, which impact the lives of millions of Indians, we asked members of the LGBTQIA+ community to share their feelings and views.

Yash Sharma
He/They
Student

Similar to the parents of millions of LGBTQIA+ Indians, Yash Sharma's parents are waiting for marriage equality for all.  Photo courtesy: Yash Sharma

Yash Sharma is the founder of Humans of Queer, an Instagram page that provides space for queer lived experiences and narratives. Sharma identifies as a genderqueer homosexual and has been following the proceedings closely. He says, "It’s been 7 days, and we have witnessed some hair-raising moments from our side while at the same time triggering responses from the side of the government of India. No doubt our lawyers are doing some amazing work, but referring to gays and lesbians as genderqueers, or asking who is going to be the wife in queer relationships shows how ignorant and un-sensitised the opposition is. Remember, LGBTQIA+ people have been subjected to such hurtful statements all their lives."

Sharma agrees to a certain extent that our society might not seem very prepared but insists that LGBTQIA+ persons and their families are also a part of society and are ready for marriage equality. The 24-year-old elaborates, "The decision of our recognition should not be asked by them. Even though I believe marriage is not a very appropriate tool to justify my relationship with or love for someone, it is the only way to make my partner’s life secure in terms of rights, insurance, etc. On an individual level, I would marry my partner tomorrow, but I can’t."

Sharma also stresses the additional burden that is placed on LGBTQIA+ relationships in the absence of legal recognition, "I have also witnessed that many of the queer relationships come to an end after a few years of dating because they don’t have any next steps. It is very easy to part ways, and that makes queer people less hopeful about relationships."

Speaking of the positive shift that has happened post-decriminalising homosexuality and his desire for a family, he shares, "We have seen a lot of acceptance and conversation after stripping down Section 377, and I believe this case can push acceptance of queer relationships in India. I would not say we need this because non-queer folks have this right. I want this because, as a citizen of India, I want to raise my family legally, irrespective of my gender identity and sexuality, like any other human being would. I really hope that this case allows me to write my spouse’s name in legal forms someday."

Abhishek (name changed on request)
He/him
Corporate lawyer

Abhishek (name changed on request) is a cis-gender homosexual man who believes the conversation around marriage equality is pretty simple. The Mumbai resident tells us, "It is about the sanction of fundamental rights like the right to choice and living with dignity. Two consenting adults, irrespective of gender or sexual orientation, should be granted basic social benefits if they need them to be granted together. As long as my right does not infringe on your rights, why must anyone have an issue with it? Unfortunately, in our country, individual rights and the rights of consenting adults in a relationship are regulated by laws, which are legislated by the parliament, thus the need for this entire Supreme Court proceeding."

The 29-year-old outlines the dual-toned arguments, "What’s heartwarming is the Honourable Constitutional Bench’s attitude. They seem to be cognizant of the social ostracism that the LGBTQIA+ community has faced in the past; they seem to be aware of the historical international jurisprudence, and they are also aware of what medical councils have to say. However, it is triggering to learn about the submissions of the Solicitor General. In 2023, statements like ‘sexuality can be acquired' is a problematic stance. Presenting parliamentary debates dating back to the 1950s where no other country had supporting laws is redundant."

When asked about his hopes for a positive outcome, he says, "I don’t know what the outcome of the story will be." All I hope is that it is progressive enough for India to call itself a progressive, inclusive, and evolving country. I don’t know whether the LGBTQIA+ community will be granted marriage certificates, but I hope regulators such as SEBI, RBI, EPFO, IRDA, etc. are granted instructions to have policies that permit two partners, irrespective of sex, to avail of benefits that can be availed of by partners of the same sex. And probably, then, we can call ourselves citizens of a country that ensures equality of status and of opportunity."

Meghna Mehra
She/They
Author and Political Consultant

Having followed the proceedings for days, Meghna Mehra is appalled at the lack of knowledge, and sensitivity towards the LGBTQIA+ community by the lawyers opposing marriage equality. Photo courtesy: Meghna Mehra

"With the court case going on, I realised that a lot of lawyers representing the government have no idea what they are opposing and are focusing on the herd mentality. From accusing the petitioners of being elitist to using the word transgender aggressively, it reeks of ignorance, and there is a need to sensitise our lawyers," says author and political consultant Meghna Mehra.

Founder of the All India Queer Association (AIQA), Mehra identifies as a cis-gender asexual woman and wishes to send a copy of her book, Mini Dictionary of the LGBTQIA+ Community, to the representatives of the government of India as well as the lawyers who are opposing marriage equality. The 25-year-old shares, "The lawyers have amalgamated sexual orientation and gender identity. It is important to note that these are not your everyday people—these are the privileged lot of the upper class who have attained education from reputable and, in some cases, foreign institutions, yet their delusional mindset and lack of knowledge about the LGBTQIA+ community remain shocking. It seems that either they are pretending to not know how love works or they are incapable of love."

Recounting an absurd question posed in court, she says, "Some lawyer asked who will be the wife, and it just speaks volumes about how heterosexuals refuse to think beyond the binary of husband and wife. I believe marriages are made by social order, and these instances have only proved my statement to be true. They are debating to maintain a patriarchal, heterosexual social order where the wife is a giver and the husband is a taker, where they want one partner to be inferior."

Mehra also voices her concern regarding the questionable argument of LGBTQIA+ parents being less than, "I want to ask those who speak about child rights in the court, what about numerous queer children that are bullied and dragged to suicide every day?" What about the children of heterosexual couples that suffer mental, sexual, verbal, and physical abuse? Why are their rights as parents not taken away or debated? If a queer couple adopts or has children, yes, queer folks can have children on their own; it's normal. Wouldn't they be more loving to their kids because they are choosing to have these children as opposed to heterosexual couples who have children for son preferences, to save a marriage, to entrap the wife towards motherhood, among other reasons?"

Dirk Lewis
He/Him
Communications professional

Mumbai-resident Dirk Lewis says the choice to get married should exist for all. Photo courtesy: Dirk Lewis

"I believe it's quite disturbing to see the views of our government and how they treat and talk about us in such a derogatory manner, just to please a certain vote bank," says communications professional Dirk Lewis. Identifying as a cis-gendered homosexual man, Lewis has worries about an exclusionary existence, "It makes me wonder, if they are so vehemently opposed to the idea of a naturally born and perfectly normal set of people among them, wouldn't they use marriage and the registration of it to adversely segregate and mark out people? In the future, when it comes to schemes, policies, or even just simple things like social comments or opinions, would we be treated differently, would we be supported socially, or would we be targeted wrongfully."

The 41-year-old does not wish to get married, but stresses the importance of marriage equality, "Let people just be. I personally don't want to get married, for me it’s an evil of a patriarchal society where one exerts dominance over the other. However, I support equal rights for all, so the choice should exist for all. It should be the way of the world. The time to just leave primitive thinking behind is now. If not now, future generations will surely see things differently, and history will certainly judge our generations accordingly."

Also Read: "Our family is just like any other family in your neighbourhood"

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